It's hard, no doubt, to continuously, day in and day out, dedicate hours of your day to study; to read that chapter of your textbook, to write ten pages of notes, hell, it's hard to even get out of bed sometimes. University was never designed to be easy; it was never supposed to be this point in your life that you could just blissfully glide through with no care in the world because firstly, that'd be a waste of your money and secondly, it's because you've no motivation, no goal; no way of guiding yourself towards whichever path you wish/want to take. Because even if it's just an inkling, go for it.
Lately, I've been feeling unmotivated, somewhat dejected and feeling as if I'm stuck in this eternal rut of uncertainty. I feel this way every now and then, perhaps once every few months; I feel this way because some part of me says that I don't do enough, that I'm never going to reach my goal of becoming a doctor. My mind does all these freakish calculations and over-analyses the disconcerting statistics regarding the chances of getting into med school (is my GPA good enough? What the hell is going to happen with GAMSAT? Will I be able to prove to strangers that my heart's in this? Will I even get an interview?).
There are days when I just think: is it even worth it? All this study, all the times I've declined invitations to go out (to be fair, I'm not one to thrive in this respect of my life but that's a blog post for another day) is it truly worth it when I don't even know for certain that I'll even get in? I'm aware that there's a very real chance of not getting into med school. Trust me, I think about this on the daily, but I always push this thought to the back of my mind; I don't let it rule my day because I do believe in that if you place effort into something, and I mean unintelligible amounts of effort, you'll get there, one day.
Now, the most obvious way in which I find motivation again is to think about my future. Oftentimes on the bus ride to uni do I envision myself some two-three years into the future; I'm sitting in bed, simultaneously browsing for clothes whilst I watch an episode of whatever, when suddenly, I receive an email from my university's medical school. Immediately, my heart starts pounding, my palms begin to sweat because I know that it's the email that will determine whether or not I'm going to med school.
I open the email and immediately burst into tears because it only takes one word—congratulations—for me to realise that I did it. I made it into medical school. From there, I take a few moments to allow everything to sink in, then to finally bring myself to call my parents up at work. I, of course, start crying again once I tell them the news, my parents start crying then I tell my friends and they all cheer me on, perhaps in tears, too. Whenever I think about this, I become overwhelmed and I, honestly, start to tear up a bit. Well, water lines my eyes and they fail to trickle down my cheek (as always), but hey it's a strong indication that the whole doctor thing must mean a lot to me as it's able to screw with my emotions and it pretty much confirms, to me anyway, that choosing to do medicine is something I don't regret. Not ever.
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| Image from: Spotebi |
Whilst this post is definitely more geared towards those who have found themselves in a negative space in terms of med school, applying the following strategies to stay motivated should, hopefully, translate as motivation is sort of a universal language. That is, it doesn't matter whether you're wanting to do law, medicine, psychology, secondary school teaching, hairdressing or whatever, because staying motivated comes down to one crucial thing: purpose. Actually, it's a whole mixture of things, but I feel that having a purpose, a goal, in mind is one of the more important aspects to staying motivated.
I find that whenever I'm in a rut, watching documentaries or YouTube videos about the medical community is more than enough to lift my spirits. Witnessing the field of medicine in action, through the lens of a camera, is spectacular in itself, but just imagine how much more incredible it would be to actually be there. Lately, I've been watching a number of med students who have taken time from their busy schedules to post videos on YouTube. How they have the time to juggle med school and YouTube, I'm not sure, but watching their videos has truly helped in steering me in the right direction.
Some of my favourites are Jane and Jady, Jenny Le, Jamie from The Strive to Fit, Jay from Med School Insiders and Maha from mahadotcom (holy cow, that's a lot of people whose name's start with 'J'). I think that by watching all these amazing, such inspirational people really helps to motivate me in wanting to achieve my goals, both immediate and long-term wise. Although I've only had a glimpse of what med school is like, that itself is enough for me to read that final chapter, to write down those notes, to finally bring myself to watch that 2-hour lecture but more importantly, to make me believe that yes, I do have a chance. No matter how small it may be.
And besides, how do you not feel motivated after watching Jay's "What's in My Backpack" (surgeon edition) video? I immediately started to think about what I'd pack in my own backpack, well, my hypothetical backpack considering I'm not even in med school...yet. Ha. You see, just thinking about it now is giving me the confidence I need to continue studying!
Anyway, although it's definitely an unconventional method of finding the motivation to study, it certainly did the job of helping to refuel, or rather, it served as a great reminder as to why I'm even putting myself through all of this in the first place; it was a reminder to me why I even started this blog. I wouldn't really call this one a strategy as it was more so the experience which made me feel more determined; but recently (and by recently I mean she was discharged from hospital the afternoon in which I'm writing this post), my mum was diagnosed with cholecystitis. Basically, her gallbladder (it's that small green, balloon looking thing underneath your liver that is responsible for the production of "bile" which help in the digestion of fats) was so inflamed to the point where surgery was the only option (she got a cholecystectomy where her entire gallbladder was removed).
If you were wondering, she's perfectly fine, but I must admit that amidst all the chaos that admission into hospital naturally brings about, no matter the diagnosis, I found myself to be entranced by the group of junior doctors who discussed the life expectancy of one of their patients; of the cool disposition of the surgeons, especially the one with the interesting choice of an earring; and by the nurses who I truly have so much respect for.
Whilst my mum was in surgery, my dad was seated in one of the waiting rooms where, suddenly, he saw a number of people crying, clearly distraught. They were all hugging each other, tears streaming down their faces, as they had just witnessed the last few moments of a family member that had passed away from cardiac arrest. When my dad shared this story, I felt a chill down my spine; possibly a rush of adrenaline, too. Despite the depressing nature of the story, I realised that I truly wanted to be there, in that very room, trying to save that person's life; even if it did result in death. In addition to deep af existential questioning about the inevitability of death, I also couldn't shake the feeling that my decision to become a doctor was meant to be. In fact, as soon as I got in the car to drive home, all I wanted to do was to turn the car back around; I wanted to be there in the hospital. And it's a feeling that I fail to describe because it is something I can't even articulate to those who are close to me. All I can offer is a confident "This is what I want to do because it's right. It's so very right".
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| Image from: Spotebi (again!) |
But as always, I digress. I've yet to actually give concrete advice as to how you can stay motivated in university. Well, the devil is in the details because I've purposely not titled this blog post as "How to Stay Motivated in University". Instead, this is primarily an account of my own experiences which had had a direct influence on my motivation levels, but not to worry, I do have a couple of handy tips to share:
➪ Set Small Goals
Let's say that you have a report that's due in two week's time. Planning out small, yet achievable goals, i.e. you plan to write one paragraph a night, leaving a couple of days before submission to edit etc., is one way in which you can overcome a lack of motivation as you aren't stressing yourself out by leaving things to last minute.
➪ Do Things in Increments (And Do Them Consistently)
Similar to what I've talked about above, but this piece of advice is more so to do with the fact that if you want to stay motivated, if you want to be able to keep studying, you mustn't be that person to leave things to last minute and yes, I'm talking about all you folk who study a couple of days before an exam! Whilst yes, I used to be that person, I've since realised that in doing so, I only stressed myself out even more. Now that I've kind of gotten into the habit of doing things in a more...appropriate manner, I've learned that by doing things in small steps i.e. being consistent with my study habits by studying for one hour a night to eventually increase that to say five hours, has enabled me to keep my life on track (and to get good marks).
➪ Stick to a Routine
Download a weekly timetable form the internet where the first thing you do is write in things like when you go to uni, when you have work, when you go to volunteer; once you've done all of that, only then will you fill in the rest of the space with scheduled study (breaks included). I found that making a routine/timetable has significantly helped in managing my time effectively.
➪ Reward Yourself
I've mentioned this many a time in previous posts, but if you want to keep sane, I highly suggest that you go take planned breaks from study where breaks can range from as little as 10 minutes or as much as 2 hours. If you're prone to burning out, not taking frequent breaks could be why.
➪ Don't Be Afraid to Fail
Failures, setbacks, whatever you want to call it; we've all experienced it. I hate failure, I really do. I get disappointed in myself if I score anything below 80. And though it's taken me years to realise this, failure should be seen as an opportunity to build upon your base of knowledge, to improve. So don't dwell on your mistakes, embrace them.
➪ Surround Yourself with the Right People
I really can't stress this enough. When you have friends, family, professors, councillors, even, in your life who never fail to support you, who believe in you, who encourage you and simply bring out the best in you, the levels of motivation felt will be overwhelming. Like me, I have a couple of close friends of mine who are set on getting into med school and because we're able to motivate each other, it really helps for us to realise that what we're doing has a purpose. And besides, I'm competitive by nature so that's fun ;)
➪ Remember the Big Picture
You see, my little anecdotes were relevant after all! Whenever I'm in a bad mood, whenever I don't feel like studying, all I need to do is to think about why exactly I chose to go down this path in the first place and sometimes, that's more than enough to get me back on track.
If you want to read more about motivation on a psychological level, you can do so here. Staying motivated isn't the easiest thing to do; it isn't easy to continuously put your head down and read over your notes. It's difficult, I know. But just think about where you'll be in five, ten years time because if that doesn't make you smile, if that doesn't make you feel motivated, then I don't know what you're doing in life. So I'll leave you with this quote, a quote I've recently stumbled upon that has helped me to get out of this horrible, horrible rut.
Believe in your infinite potential.
Your only limitations are those you set upon yourself.
— Roy T. Bennett
Charging through a report I don't even want to do but I have to if I want to ever make something of myself in the future,
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